The Shyest Girl in Town

If you've never been shy, you don't know how lucky you are!  I first remember being shy in the first grade.  Luckily I had a wonderful teacher, Miss Duke, who tried to help me overcome it.  She held me on her lap when I was embarrassed because I couldn't do the arithmetic problems on the blackboard. Once I was too shy to ask permission to go to the restroom and wet clothes resulted - that was really bad.  I skipped lunch and sat outside on the playground so my skirt would dry and when the kids would ask why my dress was wet, I told them I'd spilled water on it.  My Music teacher, Miss Schultz, persecuted me because I wouldn't sing loud enough for her to hear and I think that may be why I've never felt comfortable trying to sing.  In high school I was the only girl in the small consolidated school I attended who didn't play basketball -- and that was because of my shyness too.  I didn't want anyone to see my knobby knees or see how clumsy I was at sports.  The school superintendent, Clyde Eoff, was an ogre and he gave me a hard time because I wouldn't suit up.  One time they didn't even have enough players to have a sub and when a player was injured, they had to play with only four girls so I wasn't very popular with the coach.

The shyness continued on through high school and into college and was getting worse instead of better.  Speech class was the worst of all and it was a required class so I had no choice about taking it.  I had a half-time job working in the English department and also worked for my speech teacher.  He, too, had a problem with turning red (or blushing) when he talked, so he was most sympathetic with me and I even made an A in speech.

When I went to work at IMC, I was in awe of my boss, Dick Kerner, and would turn red whenever I talked to him.  He was from the big city of Chicago and I'm sure thought I was the biggest hick he'd ever seen - he'd laugh at me for saying "po-lice" and my other Oklahoma miscues.  There would always be someone who would call attention to my red face when I was embarrassed and that made it much worse.

I've been trying to remember just when I stopped being so shy and when I stopped blushing when I'd talk to certain people -- but, thankfully, it did finally go away for the most part.  Occasionally when I'm feeling inadequate or intimidated, it will reoccur and it brings back all those old feelings of shyness that I had for so long!